Hit by a Pitch

Tomorrow we have what I usually refer to as “the big ultrasound.” People call it a level 2 ultrasound or an anatomy scan. It’s a long, very detailed ultrasound where they, well, as you might have guessed, check the anatomy and make sure everything is where it should be and in good shape.

This is when most people find out the baby’s sex if they want, or find out about stuff like “soft markers” for chromosome abnormalities. We found out the baby’s sex and that the chromosomes are all perfect way back during week 12, thanks to CVS (if anybody reading wants to know more about my CVS experience, I’d be happy to share; otherwise, I might not write about it because it probably wasn’t very different from anybody else’s CVS experience). That means I’m not all excited and on edge about learning the sex, and I’m not worried about chromosomes.

Of course, knowing me, that doesn’t mean I’m not worried about anything. The one thing that CVS can’t tell you is whether the baby has a neural tube defect. There’s a screening test for neural tube defects, but I didn’t do it because it’s not as reliable as the level 2 ultrasound and, like with any screening test, there’s a risk of getting a false positive. Fortunately, the risk of neural tube defects does not increase with age, and I was taking folic acid before getting pregnant. I’m also worried about everything being okay — the baby’s heart, other organs, bones — everything I don’t already know about. The good news is that I’m nowhere near as freaked out as I was while waiting for the CVS results but I’m still worried, because that’s what I do.

If I put the worry aside for a second, I realize that this is going to be very cool. It’ll be by far the longest and best look we’ve had at the kid. Assuming everything is okay, that’s going to be totally awesome.

And assuming everything is okay, that means I really have to start buying more baby stuff. I’ve gotten a few things already (holy crap, there are some awesome cloth diapers that might be softer than the baby’s butt), but I want to start buying more stuff as soon as possible, because we’re poor and I want to spread the costs over several months. If we end up having to buy many diapers, say, after it’s time to send the kid to daycare, we’re going to be screwed.

It’s great how when one worry passes, there’s another one waiting to replace it. I should work on the whole worry thing before the kid gets here. Worrying doesn’t help anything, and I don’t want to pass my anxiety to him. Maybe I’ll start meditating.