So, I have some substantive things to tell you about, I think, sometime soon. My week has pretty much been occupied by feeling weird and preparing for my fantasy football draft. Earlier this evening, I sat my son down and told him the following:
Son, you had one opportunity in life to mess with my fantasy football draft. That was the year I was pregnant with you and didn’t drink more than one beer maybe once or twice a month after the first trimester, which is useless in terms of fantasy football draft strategy. You don’t get to mess with my fantasy football draft tonight.
So while Ben and I were drafting, Soren played with Play Doh. He drew on Peaches with an orange highlighter. He partially dismantled Coltrane’s crate. He peed, sometimes where he was supposed to and sometimes not. He ran shrieking through the house. He did other things of which I’m sure I’ll become aware at an awkward time in the future, possibly with carrots.
If you know anything about me, you know I’m really serious about fantasy football. I love playing fantasy football. How well I do in fantasy football directly affects how much I enjoy any given NFL season. So you can imagine my dismay this year when I entered our draft lobby to see that I had the 12th pick (of 12 teams).
Okay, that sucks. But I prepared my strategy for this inauspicious beginning. I might end up having to decide between Marshawn Lynch and Matthew Stafford. Worse things could happen. I’ll probably get Jimmy Graham. (My original strategy was, briefly, as follows: Get an awesome QB. Get an awesome TE. Load up on RBs and WRs.) Okay, that’s cool. Picking last isn’t the end of the world, because you get to pick first in the second round. Jimmy Graham is awesome and I’m going to get him. I was really excited about getting Jimmy Graham.
But then something happened. A thing appeared on my screen saying the draft was over. I closed out of the draft and the main page for our league said that our draft wasn’t in progress. That was weird and it was almost time for the draft, so Ben and I were getting a little stressed. Finally, we were able to get into the draft lobby again and this time, I had the 11th pick and Ben had the 12th pick. It turned out our commissioner’s wife had some sort of problem getting in and he had to reset the draft. Then, long story short, Ben cried and the commissioner reset it again. So we had random draft order #3. This time, I had the 4th pick (Ben had 8th). This was a huge improvement for me, but if I can non-problem problem for a second, I was prepared to pick 12th and all of a sudden I was picking 4th and our draft was starting in less than a minute and holy crap I wasn’t sure what I was going to do after taking Aaron Rodgers.
So, anyway, here’s my team. I ended up with some guys (Larry Fitzgerald (2nd round), Santonio Holmes (10th round)) I really didn’t want to pick but they fell so far I figured what the hell.
So I loaded up on RBs and WRs and waited until the end to pick a D/ST and K. I failed at getting an awesome TE but got a fantastic QB.
QB Aaron Rodgers
RB Fred Jackson (LOL I originally had this as “Fred Rogers,” because it’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Dork.)
RB Willis McGahee
RB Michael Bush
RB C.J. Spiller
RB Kendall Hunter
RB Delone Carter
WR Larry Fitzgerald
WR Dez Bryant
WR DeSean Jackson
WR Santonio Holmes
WR Michael Crabtree
TE Fred Davis
K Matt Bryant
And don’t worry, I won’t talk about my fantasy football team after this because I know nobody cares about my fantasy football team besides me. But this is what I’ve been thinking about all week. If you play fantasy football, good luck! I hope you have an awesome season!